Gapped-Toothed Women

Goodbye First Love…

Dear Garcon,

It’s so hard saying goodbye to your first love. I haven’t spoken to mine for quite sometime now. When I sat down realized how long its been, and how seldom I’ve thought of them, and how they probably haven’t thought of me…I’m content to say goodbye…with that goodbye left a plethora of insecurities, doubts, and fears. Though I’ll always treasure our secret moments and have only the fondest of memories of them; a new opportunity for love has opened up. So I begin the journey to find my missing piece.

till next time,

Forgive me first love

 

[Excuse me first love, but we're through. I need to taste the kiss from someone new]

 

 

 

Hottie in the Next Lane

Dear Garcon,

CRAZY! So im driving around smogland, on my way to work and who pulls up next to me at the light? None other than what appears to be Adonis’ reincarnation. This man is SMOKING HOT! and..OMG…did he?…yes he totally did, he looked over at Me?! Okay, okay okay, now what to do…Oh ! i know! Lets pretend as if he totally doesn’t exisit…I totally froze pretended to change the radio station and zoomed off….Does this happen to anyone else? What do you do when you see a hottie in the next lane?

till next time,

…now you know me better than that, here you go :]

 

Youuu Bettaaaa…Go to Work

Dear Garcon,

Its funny what a little RuPaul and Concealer can do to your morning. We all know good moments are best shared, and this is mine. My typical mornings are filled with caveman groans, charmingly Grinch like manners and I look like the very devil himself. But after waking up bright and early, something told me today is going to be different. I forgot about the plethora of craziness in my life, put a little bass in my walk, and havent turned back. My morning was also filled with the energy of great people. I think when you feel good, you look good and people treat you accordingly. My Starbuck’s Casanova flashed his usual smooth as silk smile along with a free shot of espresso, I got mam’ed at the dog groomer’s when i dropped of bella-wella (which is funny because im wearing slacks and a tie), and the CVS lady and I totally bonded over the sad caloric count of morning snacks, but how life is full of necessary indulgences. I don’t know if it’s the concealer or my energy but I feel on it today and nothing can stop me. I encourage you to do the same, tell yourself “Today will be different” and put some bass in YOUR walk. When yesterday’s troubles start to get you down, as [J] would say, you gotta push through.

till next time,

“aaaaand what?” – RuPaul

Dammnit…

…you may have won this time you 10 year old straight to your thighs 140 calorie per caramel delight cookie selling skanks…

[p.s.] the best $3.50 I’ve spent in a long time.

till next time,

fingers down my throat

Trendy Bitch: Asian Persuasion

 

Dear Garcon,

Here’s a (micro )Trendy Bitch update. Sorry I’m so fashionably late, reporting New York shows during London Fashion week but I’ve had no motivation to post until now so shut up and take it. But I’m absolutely LOVING the alluring and exotic micro-trend of classic Asian influence on the runway. From Vera Wang to Ralph Lauren (who’s Ad campaigns are starting to look like a United Colors of Benetton ad) there are beautiful Chinoiserie prints, flowing bell sleeves, lustrous silks, glittering gold and so much more. But i’ve always been a fan of the world traveller sense of style. Fashion is best shared and pulling influence from different cultures, via textiles, colors, smells and vibes is admirable. So now ill be on the look out for anything Asian inspired for this year. Here are a few looks from Ralph Lauren, The Blonds, Vera Wang and Luis Vuitton.

till next time,

I think I’m turning Chinese

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A Little Franco

Dear Garcon,

Just wanted to leave a few photos of the very lust worthy Dave Franco, younger brother to your 1st husband and Co-Host of the 2011 Academy Awards, James Franco. Saw this kid (25 years old) on an interview this morning and he’s just as charming and funny and sweet as jamesy himself. Sure, he has the masculine face of Zac Effron and the roughness of Joe Jonas but dude…where is this family from? What place produces such sexy sweet and funny men?…God I could use a vacation from smogland Houston.

till next time,

Mission 1: Marry into the Franco family

Happy V-Day

Dear Garcon,

I thought, what better Valentine’s Day gift to give than a 1970′s Japanese slasher film clip? Happy V-Day! This is turning to be a great one :] After last night’s ostentatiously fabulous Lobster dinner, with [J], [C], [A] and the new one [V], I’m on Valentine’s Day cloud nine right now, and I’ll be on a totally different type of cloud come Friday night [S] and I are going to do a Re-V-Day, a lot of surprises in store, but of course ill keep you posted.

till next time,

my heart bleeds for you

Sunday Brunch

 

The Newest Addition to the Old Gay Anthem Playlist?

Dear Garcon,

Soooo  I listened to Lady GaGa’s – ‘Born This Way’ – and I must say…I’m a fan. I think its fun and crazy and speaks to so many people out there. You can tell she really feels passionate about this song and her new album as she cant stop leaking shit about it on the internet. So what are the nerdy/internet savvy Little Monsters going to do now shes beat them to the punch? In true GaGa form, she gives nods to her beloved LGBT Monsters, and really has the makes of becoming the [newest addition to the old gay anthem playlist]. I’d even put it up there with Diana Ross’s – ‘I’m Coming Out’.  But the song is as the title states, about being and feeling true to the way you were born and having no shame but ‘Be a QUEEN’! (which is my favorite line from the song). I foresee [J] and I throwing our hands in the air with this one. However, I just cant help but feel like it sounds entirely too much like Madonna’s – ‘Vogue’. [C?] what do you think? But [J] and I talked about this just the other day….artists really are loosing their originality. Artists these days are so into their ‘celebrity’ that they are becoming famous for no organic reason. Haha GaGa? Unoriginal? Blasphemous i know, but it seems like you can’t look up a song these days, without discovering its actually a cover/sample of an older song. Back in the ‘Golden Days of [N]‘ he used to send me songs and have me guess the sample in the background, and quickly link me to the original version.  I loved it.  A) these were the days [N] gave me his undivided attention B) I discovered a lot of really good soul/funk music. But if you’re going to make a reported $100, 000, 000, then you better produce the most original shit i’ve never heard in my mutha effing liiiife GaGa.

till next time,

Dont be a drag, be a Queeeeen!